I have a theory when it comes to religion. I think there's two different types of people when it comes to how religion affects them, I call them them absorbers and selectors. The selector type simply selects out of scripture and sermons what they like and discard everything else. It literally goes in one ear and out the other. They are selective moralists as well, in that they will select a certain moral principle in their religion and follow it to a "T," that is if they like it or prefer it but will ignore many or all of the other moral principles. A good example of this is Andrew Wilson who selects all of the moral framework of patriarchy and the "force doctrine" but rejects many other moral principles about kindness and compassion in the New Testament. He completely ignores it a deselects it. This is why many religious people suffer extreme scrupuliosity while others never experience it at all. Because those who never experience guilt or shame or scrupulosity, are the selectors. They are very good at ignoring and deselecting whatever they don't want to feel or don't like to think about. Thus, religion for them is only empowering because they are really good as selecting out what they like and prefer and ignoring and deselecting everything else, so that it literally does not enter their mind or affect their moods.
Then you have the absorbers, the absorbers are simply a certain temperament and type, that when they take something seriously for example reading the New Testament and wanting to really understand it and know what it is saying, they will naturally absorb the psychological energy of the content. This means that if they take it seriously they will, for example if they're Buddhist, end up becoming nihilistic and lose desire for living to its fullest by believing they are not a Self and everything is impermanent (meaning nothing is permanent but fading away materially so don't become overly emotionally attached to anything). If they are reading the New Testament that strongly discourages manly vitality and the conquering spirit, and instead suggests being a more docile male-bride of a messiah seeking poverty over wealth and power as a sign of holiness, they will absorb that energy and it will negatively impact their mind and behavior.
Just as the absorbers can't understand the selectors, how they can read or listen to pious religious content daily or weekly and have it not affect them. The selectors can't understand the absorbers because they just have a different brain chemistry and personal boundary where nothing enters their psyche unless they let it. I once knew a religious person who was extremely far-right conservative/libertarian on the political spectrum, who read or listened to religious Scriptures daily on audio and yet it had no impact on their actual behavior. I remember reading some verses from the New Testament on egalitarian communitarian "socialistic" type living, and the person looked at me like they had never heard those verses before; and yet they read or listened to the New Testament daily and yet they looked at me like a deer in headlights. This is a perfect example of the selector personality type.
What this means to me is that being happy as a religious person often has a lot to do with whether or not your a selector or absorber type. As an absorber myself, I can't be a "True Believer" in any religion. For I will read and absorb religious scripture and it will have an impact on my psyche but not in a good way. If you are not an absorber then a lot of what I think and feel about religion and scripture will not apply to you. The selector type is not who I am writing for.
